Monday, June 14, 2010

I will not feed tampons to my brother. I will not...


So last thursday I decided to do a little dumpster diving to satiate my appetite because, honestly, 1/2 a cup of food a day is simply not enough!  I am part beagle! I need to look like a foot stool!  What part of this do you not understand mom? dad?  So anyway, I found a lovely used feminine hygiene product ready for the taking and eating right in the garbage.

I trotted downstairs to have some "alone time" with my prized possession when mom had to ruin everything by telling me to "drop it."  Being the good girl that I am I did (who is kidding who? I thought there'd be a food reward involved).  Well as soon as I dropped it guess who grabbed it and SWALLOWED IT WHOLE!

One guess.

So now we are watching and waiting for the offensive object to pass.  So far my brother is doing well. He is his usual grumpy JRT self with no vomiting. Watching and waiting.

I will not feed tampons to my brother. I will not feed tampons to my brother. I will not feed tampons to my brother. I will not feed tampons to my brother. I will not feed tampons to my brother. I will not feed tampons to my brother. I will not feed tampons to my brother. I will not feed tampons to my brother....

14 comments:

Niamh said...

Oh dear Toffee. Things pulled from the trash are quite a treat but we hope it doesn't stop up your brother's insides.

Your friends,
Niamh & Ambrose

Dexter said...

Oh dear. This too shall pass (we hope). 1/2 cup of kibbles / day? Are you kidding? You poor little thing.

Slobbers,
Mango

Two Pitties in the City said...

Good luck with this one. Hopefully this tampon isn't as absorbent as they say they are.

Eric said...

There you are my Sweetie pupcake, I've been pining away for you. Now what's this? As if you could ever lookie like a foot stool. . .more like a nice cosy comfy plumped up love seat, for my private viewing only of course.

Ahhhh a girlie after my own heart, it's no wonder we're the perfect couple with our devotion to food and to rooting out anything to eat, edible. I mean frankly, does it matter? Noooooo. Wagging shame you dropped your find and fed Riley instead. Crickey.You must still be starving. I'll go steal you some sandwiches and get Mom to bake you squillions of loveduppupcakes and put a double dose of exlax in a few of them for Riley. And see if you can get Kiwi to feed him a few of her dogalicious kittie logs. That'll do it....oh and save one for me...

Square pup love and squillions of snogs your sweetie pie Eric xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Lorenza said...

Oh-oh!
I hope everything goes well!
And I hope your mom and dad got the message about your amount of food!
Kisses and hugs
Lorenza

Agatha and Archie said...

THE WORST PART OF THIS STORY IS NOT WHAT WAS EATEN BUT ONE HALF A CUP A DAY??? ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? sorry we had to get that out... We are on a borrowed pooter until PL2's new one comes.. and we know the happy ending to this story!! Love A+A

Southbaygirl said...

he he...even though mom says it's not funny...it is kinda funny-but thats only because we know Riley vomited up said tampon....but seriously guys, I have to talk to you about dumpster diving.....we dogs must rise above those "cat" activities...we must wait for goodies not go diving into the trash for it.....

Woof

velcro

River said...

They are edible but we hope it doesn't swell up. Wow, I'd never survive on half a cup not if I want to look like a footstool bol My mom says I look like a couch pillow...hmmm.

love & wags,
River

TwoSpecialWires said...

And. After reading this. I will not eat tampons from the trash. I will not eat tampons from the trash. I will not eat tampons from the trash. (But they'd better figure out something ELSE for me to dig out. I get REALLY BORED closed up in the bathroom during dinner time at Gramma's while THOSE OTHER DOGS eat their gourmet din-din near the rest of the family.)

Totally understanding,
Jake

(One half cup a DAY? even I get one half cup twice a day! Protest!)

Juno said...

OMD, Toffee... yes, you did not feed that thingy to your brother. You did not feed that thingy...

Mom told us that crazy stuff relates to G8/G20 (or maybe not so related to) is going on here in T.O. The city looks fine as always but there are so many (too many?) police officers near lakeshore. Oh because of that, our mom can leave work at 3 tomorrow and Friday. That is good. :) :)


Hugs
Momo & Pinot

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Juno said...

Hello Toffee and Riley, happy belated Canada Day!!

We're happy to get to talk with your grandma the other day!!

hugs
Momo & Pinot

Unknown said...

So how's your bro doing? Have you asked him if it was worth it? Tasty Tampons indeed.

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