We didn't start the fire.

My mom told me that the dread pirate cat forced them to ingest this strange concoction as seen above. Not only is it a potent amnesiac but it also is extremely useful in putting out island fires. The Pirate cat says that he/she makes it with the blood of Yankees fans everywhere and when ingested the drink causes one to lose all sensibility and memory - hence the reason why my parents forgot to pick us up from "day camp" for several days. Once my parents lost all of their "devices" they were maintained in a stupor (more than their usual, that is) with daily doses of the following drink called "rum". This is apparently a popular drink; utilized by pirates everywhere.

We're all saved!! Arrgh.

After a long and arduous week Riley and I have finally been saved!! Mom came to rescue us today. I was so excited that I even forgave her when she showed up sans hamburger. How could I not forgive her after hearing about the ordeal that she and dad 2b have been through over the past week! Mom still seems shaken up over it; and dad 2b was so distraught he couldn't even come to pick us up. I was only able to extract bits and pieces, but from what I could understand it seems that mom and dad 2b were kidnapped by the dread pirate cat (pictured above). He/she is always on the prowl which is why it is an action shot. Additionally, no one actually knows who the dread pirate cat is since he/she is always donning the black "mask". Apparently mom and dad 2b were parent-napped and forced to go to the Caribbean. Once there, they were made to endure several hardships and were forced to perform many tasks for the dread pirate cat. Most of which revolved around feeding him/her. Over the days to follow I will elaborate the various tortures that my parents endured. For the time being I will leave you with a picture of the view from their cell which overlooked the ship that the dread pirate-cat lives on (below).

Pardon me, but do you have any Grey Poupon?

Folks! My spidey senses are tingling! I can sniff it now! I was looking up hamburgers online and found these nice folks (above) preparing my hamburger for me - just like dad 2b had promised! I am so excited because it looks like these chefs have cooked up the perfect burger for my parents to present to me!

And, if my parents are extra conscientious they will get me these awesome hamburger coasters (depicted on the right).

I hope they remember mustard.

Hap-pee New Year.

Best wishes for a happy, healthy and treat filled 2008.
nuff said. woof.

Hap-pee New Year's Eve.

Loyal readers I sincerely apologize for not posting a blog yesterday but I did not have sufficient internet access at "camp" after a Great Dane decided to "mark" his territory all over the computer here. But, loyal readers, I am here for you now. To the left is a photo of "Bagel" (mmm...bagels). Bagel was mom's first "very own" dog. Mom adopted her at a humane society in Canada in the winter of 2000. Here she is shown partying it up on New Year's eve 2004 in Illinois at her friend J's house. I believe that was Bagel's last New Year's as she had heart disease and had to go to doggy heaven the following October. Bagel was a beagle who also loved treats, cuddling, food, sniffing good stuff on the ground and rolling in rabbit poop. By the way, I recall that Riley and I were left back in Michigan that New Years to celebrate with the Parsons*. Left behind, AGAIN. Notice a trend here? Mom says it is because J's kitties "Armani" and "Versace" would not appreciate a Jack Russell harassing them; yeah, right. I hope that hamburger is nice and juicy....with EXTRA tater bites on the side.

(* depicts a name that has been changed)

Will blog for food.

Faithful reader "Izzy" pointed out that maybe my parents being at the "gallows" is really not such a good thing for them (see comment section in previous blog entry). This in turn means that it may not be a good thing for ME; and it is all about me, of course. Anyway, I may need to find another way of keeping myself in the lifestyle to which I have become accustomed. With that Pats vs. Giants game on tonight I thought perhaps I could wager on the game. In seek of guidance I turned to "The Sports Guy" who writes on ESPN.com and instead read an incredibly amusing entry by the "Sports Gal" (the beloved wife of "guy"). She informed and entertained me with her picks of the week. In addition she edumacated me on the "science" of picking a winner. For a good laugh read the article here.



nb. "public" I think you'd especially enjoy!



p.s. also a warm "woof" and lick out to Velvis

Oops! I peed on your bed!

So my *sigh* brother today finally convinced me that we are here at doggy day camp for a little while. I should have know it when mom and dad 2b did not show up on Monday night to pick us up. I should have known when dad 2b promised me a hamburger - it was all too good to be true. Riley, my brother, told me that he found a pamphlet for a resort
in the U.S. Virgin Islands called Gallows Point. He also found a plane ticket while rooting for some underwear to chew on. The ticket was dated December 25th going to St. John via San Juan. So while Riley and I are here stuck in the cold weather in a cage, mom and dad 2b are likely sipping fancy fruity drinks - you know the kind they serve with a fancy paper umbrella - anyway they are likely sipping on fruity drinks, basking in the sun and up to gosh knows what other shenanigans! I cannot explain in words how angry this makes me but I assure you my loyal readers, that I will certainly let them have a piece of my mind - or the contents of my bladder - when they get home!!! Besides, I can just blame any "accidents" on the cat - like the one pictured above (Kiwi is a 6 year old domestic white haired kitty that also lives with us).